Tom Cruise "Mellowing" (AKA Becoming Even More Of A Nutjob) As Fatherhood Approaches

Via Scrudge:

TOM Cruise yesterday revealed his latest bizarre mission..to eat his new baby's placenta.

Cruise vowed he would tuck in straight after girlfriend Katie Holmes gives birth, saying he thought it would be "very nutritious".

The Mission Impossible star, 43, said: "I'm gonna eat the placenta. I thought that would be good. Very nutritious. I'm gonna eat the cord and the placenta right there."

 

Mmmm...bilical cord.

Riiiight. I remember David Carradine made this same bizarre announcement back in the seventies when he was living his post-Kung Fu-dropout-turn on-freak-people-out-lifestyle. If I remember correctly, he ended up planting the placenta in the ground under a fruit tree. See, that way they could eat the fruit from the tree - same thing, right? Of course it is!

But, hey, bon appetite, Tommy. Just keep nibbling away at that career.

UPDATE: Looks like somebody got a call from his publicist. (H/T Wizbang Pop!)

UPDATE II: It's a girl!

"And it was delicious!"

 

Comments

[AnonymousDrivel]

I think we can figure out where Katie Holmes' drug pile for birthing have been going.

And a follow-up: Who's up for Scientology? Anyone? And do you have to be nuts already to join, or will they teach you?

[John from WuzzaDem]

What's next, WuzzaDem? Brad Pitt frosting a cake with his newborn's poo?

OK, I guess I can stop working on that post.

Oh, and FYI, I believe it's Brangelina.

[Swamp Rabbit]

I'm Shocked that I'm not Shocked,,,,

[Richmond]

Ugh. It is beyond gross.

[Steve]

You guys are all so gullible. It would be pathetic if it weren't so laughable.

[John from WuzzaDem]

You're right, "Steve". "Us guys" are gullible. I'm feel so stupid for believing that Tom Cruise would say something asinine.

[Buckley F. Williams]

"I feel so stupid for believing that Tom Cruise would say something asinine."

That would clearly be out of character for Tom.

On a serious note, are you supposed to go with a red or a white wine with afterbirth? I'd hate to get caught out there some day and not know the proper etiquette.

[Klabdak]

Can I just say that Tom Cruise has succeeded in getting everyone to talk about him? Not Mission Impossible. It is more like Mission Accomplished.

I say who gives a shit. The sad thing is the baby who had no choice being born to these two nutjobs.

[AnonymousDrivel]

Steve - You want to see gullible? How about that Scientology schtick?

Check out xenu.net and scientology illustrated specifically for a simplified overview. You haven't seen gullible until you see a Scientologist... or certain personalities who inhabit Hollywood. Of course, that's not me talking. It's my thetans.

Now where's my credit card and does someone have a spare E-meter? I think I need to be audited for my blasphemy. I think there's "blasphemy" in this cult but I'm still not certain. I'll know for sure when I get to Grade I. Something about enhanced ability to recognizing problems. Clearly, questioning the "religion" is a failure to communicate, so mastering that would be helpful.

[dragonlady474]

Gawd, I think Tom's cheese has slid of the cracker.

[AnonymousDrivel]

Oh, and Bob. About your graphics selections - the diaper pic was pretty disturbing. The umbilical cord, however... well, I'm not sure I have the words.

Have you been watching too many National Geographic specials or late-night horror flicks? The natural progression leads me to believe that either Jeanine Garofalo or Barbra Streisand are on deck. I'm not sure even the diehards could stomach that.

[Sobek]

Anonymous Drivel: I have it on the highest authority that Scientology is "the sh*t."

[AnonymousDrivel]

You had quite a pile by the end of the interview, Sobek, but I expected a bit more depth. Enlightening nonetheless. Thank you for treading where mere mortals dare not.

[benny bird]

That the trouble with these hollywood celeberties they join some crazy wacky dangerous new age cults like the SCIENTOLOGY freaks then they just go loco just like PAMELA ANDERSON aand her deal with PETA

[Kiki B.]

As a former OB nurse, I can attest to the fact that placenta eating is common in some cultures. I have even spoken to some colleagues who were offered a bite by the new parents. Thank the Lord, I wasn't one of those nurses. Helllooooo!!! Biohazardous waste, anyone??

[AnonymousDrivel]

Just curious Kiki B. - how are those cultures faring these days? Yes, I've heard of the practice too. I just don't recall who does it.

Did any of your colleagues bite? I've done bioresearch and clinical too and, well, I'd be donning blood-borne disease protection gear faster than you could say "hepatitis". I'd probably have a barf bag and a pamphlet entitled "You, Your Baby's Placenta, and 10 Reasons To Celebrate With Pizza Instead" handy too.

[thebizofknowledge]

I stumbled across your blog while I was in the process of doing some online research. Did Cruise actually say this? If so, that is truly bizarre and really only adds to the general consensus that he is himself in need of psychiatric intervention.