New Study Shows John Kerry Knows Ass From Hole In The Ground 53% Of The Time (Or Less)

"Now, that's definitely my ass. No? Are you sure?"

I think it must be a lot less:

Sen. John Kerry claimed this morning on NBC TODAY that only 53% of America's children graduate from high school [actually, he claims that only 47% graduate - see update below] -- a claim that raised eyebrows in the NBC control room...

KERRY: "That's terrific. But 53 percent of our children don't graduate from high school. Kids don't have after-school programs... He didn't ask America to sacrifice anything to achieve great goals and the biggest example is making the tax cut permanent for the wealthiest people in America. The average American struggles to find time to take carry of families, working two or three jobs... It's a disgrace. He did not tell the real state of the union."

Kerry's 53% claim conflicts with a recent press release from the U.S. Census Bureau: "High School Graduation Rates Reach All-Time High"

And the Census Bureau's own website states: 85.9 Percent Of Americans Aged 20-24 Are High School Graduates. (U.S. Census Bureau Website, www.census.gov , Accessed 2/1/06)

So, now it's time to play one of John Kerry's favorite games: "What I meant to say was..."

Senator John Kerry (D-MA) tosses around "the old pig skin" as members of the local fire department look on.

UPDATE: Reader Pookie points out a mistake in the wording of the first paragraph of the Drudge article - Kerry says that 53% of "our children" don't graduate from high school. So, he's actually claiming that only 47% graduate. My apologies to the senator. Still, I'll give him the benefit of a doubt and say that he knows his ass from a hole in the ground as much as 53% of the time.

UPDATE II: Flip at Suitably Flip has the real figures.

UPDATE III: Michelle Malkin has the video.

Comments

[pookie18 (Free Republic)]

He claims that 53% don't graduate. Therefore his claim is that only 47% do...not 53%.

[Charles]

LOL, I love your stuff, Dude, but this one is priceless! I'm linking to it!

[John from WuzzaDem]

Hey, you're right, Pookie. The Drudge article misworded that first part.

[Jeff H]

False dichotomy: Kerry's ass IS a hole in the ground.

[John from WuzzaDem]

Why are you so obsessed with Kerry's ass, Jeff?

[Tom]

Lurch throws like a girl.

[MCPO Airdale]

I would have left high school without a diploma if I had to sit through the socialist propaganda that passes for education in Mass.

[RA]

Thanks for the belly laugh. LOL All funny humor has a grain of truth running through it. LOL

[Jeff H]

I'm not obsessed with it--butt every time I turn on the TV, it's staring back at me. And it's just so damned huge. I swear they patterned the Big Dig after it.

[wxjames]

Jeff, that's Kennedy's ass. The hills to the left are the Berkshires.

[AnonymousDrivel]

Scanning the photo caption, I'm wondering why the editor doesn't mention Sen. Kerry's curious donning of the NASA bunnysuit once again.

[John from WuzzaDem]

I'm sure he was tempted.

[Chris]

Ahh... the infamous condom suit. What a perfectly ironical point in history as we finally figured out how big a dick Senator Kerry really is.

[Jeff H]

Just be sure to remember: being a big dick and having one are 2 completely different things.

[hillary doesn't see the light]

since i live in idiot john kerry's homestate, i would like people to know, that a boston talk radio host, howie carr has been a critic of kerry for 25 years and has a website www.howiecarr which hyperlinks to a website dedicated to the idiot john kerry, the hyper link is called liveshot, and the hyperlink that shows big fat socialist slob kennedy of chappaquidic is also an idiot is called fatboy.

a massachusetts statehouse politician use to remark that kerry's initials jfk really stands for just for kerry.