Mary Landrieu Bobs, Weaves, Implodes

I'm Chris Wallace, welcome to Fox News Sunday.

 

 

 

Joining us now to discuss the continuing human drama unfolding in the wake of hurricane Katrina are Louisiana's two senators, Democrat Mary Landrieu, who's here in the studio with us...

 

 

 

Hi, Chris.

 

 

 

...and Republican David Vitter, who's been visiting with thousands of evacuees in Houston. He joins us from just outside the Astrodome.

 

 

 

Good morning, Chris.

 

 

 

Senators, I want to thank you both for being here with us today, I know you must be extremely busy dealing with the aftermath of this tragedy. Senator...

 

 

 

Chris, I hate to interrupt you, but I just wanted to point out that I've visited the hurricane victims, too.

 

 

 

I'm sure you have. Senator Vitter...

 

 

 

On the ground, displaying compassion, dressed in civilian clothes, just as my colleague is now.

 

 

 

Thanks for pointing that out, Senator.

 

 

 

I'd be there right now, but I, um, had a lot of paperwork to catch up on.

 

 

 

I don't doubt that.

 

 

 

You know - hurricane paperwork.

 

 

 

Senator Landrieu, I'm sure everyone knows that you've spent time with the victims of this hurricane. After all, you are a US Senator to the state of Louisiana.

 

 

 

Thanks, Chris.

 

 

 

Now, I want to talk about...

 

 

 

I'm sorry, maybe I'm being a little oversensitive, but were you being sarcastic just then?

 

 

 

No, not at all.

 

 

 

Because it sounded kind of sarcastic - like maybe you don't believe I've actually been to Louisiana since the flood.

 

 

 

Senator, I can assure you that I was being completely sincere. Can I ask Senator Vitter a question now?

 

 

 

Sure. Sorry.

 

 

 

Senator Vitter...

 

 

 

Chris, I'm sorry, but I just can't let your sarcastic remark go unanswered...

 

 

 

I wasn't being...

 

 

 

Now, just to prove that I have been on the front lines, I want to show a picture that was taken when I was with one of the evacuees.

 

 

 

There's no reason to...

 

 

 

Now, here you can see me with a little girl - and I'm displaying a lot of compassion here - you can clearly see a Coast Guard officer in the background...

 

 

 

Senator, I'm sorry to interrupt you, but that appears to be a Sri Lankan military officer in the background.

 

 

 

A what? Oh, I guess it does look like that, doesn't it.

 

 

 

Wasn't this photo taken when you visited Sri Lanka after the tsunami?

 

 

 

...

 

 

 

Well, you both saw the interview we just did with Vice Admiral Thad Allen, who replaced FEMA Director Mike Brown as the head man in charge of the recovery efforts in Louisiana. Senator Landrieu, how do you feel about this personnel change - was this a good move on the part of the president?

 

 

 

Chris, my staff members have had several lengthy phone conversations with Vice Admiral Allen, and based on the feedback I've gotten from them, I'm confident he's the right man for the job.

 

 

 

Senator Vitter?

 

 

 

Chris, I've met with the Admiral, in fact I was with him Thursday for a full briefing, and I've been very impressed with him.

 

 

 

A lot of people have been saying...

 

 

 

Chris, sorry for interrupting, but I just wanted to make it clear that I plan to meet with Admiral Allen as soon as possible. I've just been very busy with, uh...

 

 

 

Hurricane paperwork?

 

 

 

Exactly. But I can assure you that I will be meeting with him, and I'm sure I'll be impressed with him, just as my colleague was.

 

 

 

Senator Landrieu, you've been especially critical of the federal government's response to the hurricane and subsequent flood. Here's a clip of you on the floor of the Senate just a few days ago.

 

 

 

And I intend to find out why the federal response, particularly the response of FEMA, was so incompetent and insulting to the people of our state.

 

 

 

Senator, there's a lot of talk right now about the blame game, and...

 

 

 

That's not my fault.

 

 

 

I didn't say it was.

 

 

 

Because this senator won't be playing.

 

 

 

That's good to know, but...

 

 

 

Don't get me wrong, there's plenty of blame to go around - some at the federal level, certainly with FEMA, of course plenty of blame to be placed on Homeland Security, certainly the President himself will have a lot to answer for...I think that's about it, but that's plenty of blame, and I for one don't intend to engage in finger-pointing.

 

 

 

But, isn't that exactly what you were doing in the clip we just saw, and in the statement you just made?

 

 

 

You know who's playing the blame game? The president. He's the one who's to blame for all the criticism of state and local...

 

 

 

Isn't that finger-pointing?

 

 

 

What's wrong with finger-pointing, Chris?

 

 

 

You just said you weren't going to engage in...

 

 

 

Well, I've deceided to make an exception in the case of people who deserved to have fingers pointed at them for blaming other people.

 

 

 

Let's move on. Senator, what are your feelings about New Orleans' mayor Ray Nagin ordering a mandatory evacuation, and then leaving hundreds of buses to flood instead of using them to get people out of the city? Here's a picture of the buses.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chris, I don't know if you noticed, but those buses were flooded.

 

 

 

They weren't flooded on Saturday or Sunday, when they could have been used to aid in the evacuation effort.

 

 

 

Not if they were flooded.

 

 

 

But they weren't flooded

 

 

 

Let's see that picture again.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hel-LO?

 

 

 

Senator, I think you're missing the point. The buses were not flooded when the evacuation was ordered, yet Mayor Nagin failed to use them to evacuate the citizens of New Orleans.

 

 

 

Chris, you might be worried about what happens to a bunch of buses, but I think Mayor Nagin was more worried about the people of his city.

 

 

 

But he could have used the buses to get the people out.

 

 

 

Not if they were FLOODED!

 

 

 

They weren't...Forget it, we're out of time, and I have a headache.

 

 

 

FLOODED!

 

 

 

A splitting headache. I'm Chris Wallace, thanks for joining us, and we'll see you next Fox News Sunday.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chris? Hello?

 

This is much funnier. Actually, it's quite bizarre.

No time to watch? Residual Forces transcribed some of this train wreck.

UPDATE: Commenter Anonymous Drivel said:

Heck, John. You didn't have to work for this one. At all. When you're going to plagiarize a transcript, at least tell us that you decided to take the day off.

I considered using the actual transcript of the show, then waiting to see if anyone who hadn't seen this meltdown would notice that it wasn't satire. I don't think they would.

WTF was Landrieu thinking going on FNS? If she'd appeared on Meet the Press, she could have sat back and fielded some of Tim Russert's softballs, just like NO mayor Ray Nagin did yesterday.

Some of the things she said defy explanation, but, of course, no one from the MSM will ask her to explain why Mayor Nagin "Has a hard enough time getting his people to work on a sunny day."

??????

Isn't that racist "code language," that implies the people working for Nagin (many of whom are black) are "shiftless" or "lazy"? Not when it comes from the mouth of a Democrat.

Oh, wait - I forgot, she explained that one by saying "This administration does not support mass transit."

Again: ?????

All I can say is, watch the video. As Anonymous Drivel says:

That video should run as a permanent loop for wannabe-Senators on what not to do. One couldn't construct a better mess.

It's pretty sad when you think about it: A United States Senator should listen to Anonymous Drivel for career advice.

Comments

[seawitch]

My hometown of Gulfport Mississippi and other cities along the Coast of Mississippi may have taken the brunt of the storm and had many small towns wiped from the face of the earth but at least our Senators and Congressmen are working for us and not against us. God bless all those poor souls in Louisiana.

[MarlboroGal]

Now THAT was an amazing interview with Senator Mary Landrieu. Chris Wallace was hilarious! ROFLMAO He probably took a handful of Tylenol after the interview was over and chased it with something stronger than water. I would have.

Also, I couldn't help but notice that Landrieu is a dizzy (to the nth degree!) blond. Do you think if she changed her hair color to brown it would help? No, me either. What an airhead... Now I REALLY feel sorry for the folks in LA. The water will drain or dry up, and reconstruction will begin, BUT the folks in LA will still have that airhead to deal with. When Landrieu's Senate term is up (and should she decide to run for reelection), her opponent would be very wise to play that interview 24/7 on tv. He/she would surely win by a landslide!

[AnonymousDrivel]

Heck, John. You didn't have to work for this one. At all. When you're going to plagiarize a transcript, at least tell us that you decided to take the day off.

That video should run as a permanent loop for wannabe-Senators on what not to do. One couldn't construct a better mess.

[John from WuzzaDem]

I TiVo'd this, and before I saw that The Political Teen had a link up, I must have watched it 8 or 9 times. It defies description, or parody.

Any "Cheers" fans out there? Remember Diane's "facial tick"? Watch Landrieu after Wallace shows the clip of her on the Senate floor.

[Salt Lick]

Great, John. The only part you missed was at the very beginning, Landrieu's first words were "Hello, Mike." She got Chris confused with his dad. It indicated where things would go. (Thought bubble -- ("Chris? Why is Vitter calling him 'Chris?' Damn. That's what I get for interning Carville's nephew.")

[John from WuzzaDem]

I missed that until someone pointed it out last night. Turns out that was the best part of her interview.

[AnonymousDrivel]

It's pretty sad when you think about it: A United States Senator should listen to Anonymous Drivel for career advice.

Best backhanded compliment I've received today.

ADriveler

[John from WuzzaDem]

As if you didn't know that was a play on your "online" name.

WAAAH!

[AnonymousDrivel]

Of course, John, of course. I always appreciate your humor. All levels - from the penthouse to the outhouse. I figure this one ranks about 2/3 up with a great view of Lake Nagin and within drivelling distance of Landrieu's Folly.

[John from WuzzaDem]

Drivelling distance. Heh.

[Damian G.]

FLOODED!!!

[Stephanie]

Maybe it was just me, but it appeared that her refusal to acknowledge pre-flood buses was deliberate, and not an act of ditziness. She did some of the worst political two-stepping I've ever seen. I didn't know it was possible to hang oneself so quickly. :~P

[rob]

Tipacle dumbacrate dribble. Its pass the buck and blame the Republicans what a cow.

[rob]

Oh yea FLOODED

[Mike Church]

Too funny dude. As a Native New Orleanian and evacuated resident it made my day. I've offered my 'homage' up at my site.

[BrewFan]

You're on fire John! Another great parody. They are parodies, right? It's getting harder and harder to tell :)

[Jimmie]

Good stuff!

A note about the "mass transit quote". She didn't actually say the administration didn't support mass transit. She said they "didn't believe" in it, which strikes me as an even more bizarre thing to say. She may have meant "support", but it's damned tough to tell given the incoherence of everything else she said.

[John from WuzzaDem]

Brew - That was probably the closest I've come to an actual transcript. That interview was damned near beyond parody.

Jimmie - You're right, I don't know which statement would be more idiotic.

[azlibertarian]

If memory serves, and someone please correct me if I'm wrong, didn't Landrieu win her seat by some incredibly small margin/recount?

[John from WuzzaDem]

Looks like she was forced into a run-off (automatic in LA if any candidate fails to get at least 50%), and won that run-off 52-48%, just over 40,000 votes:

http://www.pbs.org/newshour/updates/louisiana_12-08-02.html

[bird of paridise]

They wont let them use the buses becuase they might run over a manatees and tha manatees have left to get away from the eco-freaks

[Stan Steen]

'Gotta hand it to Bottle Blonde Mary! For an airhead, she does have a highly developed ability to be blind to the obvious. It's sorta like the most basic "plain folks" definition of psychosis: Two plus two equals five....and she believes it.