The Latest In Liberal Fashion
Clerk:
Welcome, can I help you find something?
Shopper:
I'm looking for a T-shirt with a good slogan that expresses my feelings on the
threat of terrorism.
Clerk:
Oh, I've got just the thing over here on the right side of the store. We just
got these 'I do not consent to being blown up' shirts in this morning.
What do you think?
Shopper
I'm not wearing that right-wing crap! What kind of fascist store are you running
here?
Clerk:
No problem, I think we've got something that will suit your taste over here
on the left side of the store. Here you go, this little number says 'I Heart
Terrorists.' Nice, huh?
Shopper
Don't you think that's a little ambiguous? I mean who are they calling terrorists?
Clerk:
I couldn't agree more, which is why I like this one - 'US is a Terrorist Nation.'
Shopper
That's good, but I'm not crazy about the colors.
Clerk:
I know, I can't for the life of me figure out why they would use red, white
and blue. How about 'The Chickens Are Coming Home to Roost' - see, George Bush's head on the body of a chicken. Very chic.
Shopper
It would be better if he had a Hitler mustache.
Clerk:
So true. How about 'I Don't Consent to Being Searched'?
Shopper
A little tame for me.
Clerk:
'US Out of Everywhere But the US?'
Shopper
Do you have anything more, you know, reality-based?
Clerk:
We have a great selection of Che Guevara shirts.
Shopper
Are you kidding? I've got a closet full of those. Besides, I want something
more 'regional', you know what I mean?
Clerk:
Oh, I know! We just got this in. Here we are, it's kind of wordy, but I
think you'll like it. It says 'I demand that the US government do everything
in its power to protect me, provided I don't have to go through the hassle of removing my shoes at the airport or opening my bag in the subway station, and...
Sorry, it continues on the back here...
...I reserve the right to bitterly criticize the government and demand to know why this country was not being better protected should another attack occur.'
Shopper
Perfect! I'll take five.
More from Ace, Michelle, Confederate Yankee.
My Leftie cousin spent all day at the Holistic Health Fayre and all I got were these five stupid T-shirts.
Posted by: Nickie Goomba | July 22, 2005 at 12:43 PM
Hilarious, as usual.
Have you been over to Babalu blog? They linked to somebody selling a different kind of Che t-shirt: It had a picture of the dead (or wounded) Guevara, and the words "Che burger! Che burger !" Beautiful. In fact, it's too bad John Roberts' kids didn't show up at the news conference decked out in some of those; that would certainly have given Robin Givhan over at the Washington Post apoplexy.
Posted by: D. Carter | July 22, 2005 at 05:22 PM
Yeah, that was Steve from "Hog on Ice", and he got a slu of lefties raging at him for it (which of course motivated him to post an update).
Priceless.
Posted by: John from WuzzaDem | July 22, 2005 at 05:30 PM
Heh, I'd buy a "Che Burger" shirt any day. I certainly did with my "Republicans for Voldemort" shirt (sometimes, even laughing at oneself is good for ya) - I just buy stuff that I find hilarious.
Much to the (XTREEEEEEM!) detriment of my checking account.
Posted by: CollegePundit | July 22, 2005 at 06:19 PM
You mean they were not looking for one saying NUKE AMERICA and I RED HEART AL QUEDA or I RED HEART BIN LADEN?
Posted by: bird of paridise | July 23, 2005 at 07:06 AM